Comparison of Love, Sex, and Marriage and Love in a Courtly Language

Dan Savage views love, sex and marriage in a different way from the normal observation. He believes that monogamy is not just what people think and speak concerning sexual ethic. He claims that monogamy respects the truth other than the romantic standard of marriage. Savage reasons that monogamy is appropriate for several couples because certain people need more than a single partner. Savage argues that just as some people require flirting others require beatings while others need love from both sexes. He adds that such people should not hide or lie to their partners about such feelings. However, in some marriages, telling the truth about ones feelings and needs hinders the normal affairs of the relationship. To other marriages, such honesty may lead to another relational event although with permission. Therefore, in both cases, honesty is the main solution. In general, Savage views love, sex and marriage as openness in the affair with each partner sharing their feelings and observations. Such honesty makes marriage stable because truth prevails.

             Love in a courtly language, on the other hand, is a factual sect of heterosexual love that is common among the French nobility from earlier days and beyond.  This had a caring effect on succeeding Western, approaches to love. Love in a courtly language is the soft conveyance of sexual desire, emotional happiness and self-expression to the other partner. In other words, it is just an intricate convention of behavior developed around the anguished male lovers’ miserable compliance to a sneering, romanticize woman who was his typically social improvement. Therefore, courtly love is an unlawful form of love commemorated in the literature of the Renaissance and the Middle age. In this love, an aristocrat dedicates himself to a dignified woman who is typically married and pretends to be different to protect her repute. In general, love, sex and marriage as viewed by Dan Savage are hugely different from love conveyed in a courtly language.